White and Red Hats form Union to End FEMA

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By Michael Baxter

White and Red Hats have shelved ideological differences—at least for now—and united to fight a familiar foe: The Federal Emergency Management Agency, the governmental goliath that has been terrorizing, robbing, and murdering patriotic citizens ever since the late William Jefferson Clinton and his foul wife empowered the agency in 1993.

Over the past six years, White Hats have fought FEMA in its natural habitat—disaster zones ravaged by fires, floods, hurricanes, and tornadoes. In each instance, invariably, White Hats caught agency agents tormenting and pillaging innocents whose lives natural and manmade disasters had upended. According to sources in Gen. Smith’s office and at US Army Special Operations Command, White Hats have “neutralized” approximately 860 FEMA personnel, including upper management and former director Brock Long, while the agency’s current director, Deanne Criswell, is currently at GITMO awaiting a military tribunal. But that hasn’t stopped the Deep State from keeping her in the public eye via artificial intelligence, CGI, and holography.

In 2022, White Hats attacked FEMA in its own stronghold, the highly secretive and virtually impregnable Mount Weather Emergency Operations Center, an innocuous-sounding monicker for a subterranean labyrinth brimming with enough firepower to start a war. Although White Hats seized, and have held, Mt. Weather, the victory hasn’t shaken FEMA’s resolve or quenched its thirst for power over the public.

White Hats ascribed FEMA’s relentlessness to the agency as being more significant than the sum of its parts. Entrenched in evil, FEMA’s hierarchal structure is designed to survive amputation. If someone in a leadership position is taken out, a subordinate is often unofficially promoted to fill the departee’s shoes. Only a mass culling, White Hats say, can bring FEMA to its knees, though, given its historical endurance, that may not be a foregone conclusion.

Nonetheless, in the wake of Hurricanes Helene and Milton, which many believe were geoengineered by the Deep State, a concerted effort is underway to cripple the alphabet agency; however, the current offensive didn’t begin that way.

When White Hats failed to respond immediately to an armed FEMA presence in North Carolina, Red Hats—an amalgam of active-duty and retired military and non-federal law enforcement—took matters into their own hands. Their leader, known as Colonel Kurtz, landed troops in Asheville and surrounding communities to halt FEMA’s takeover of the area.

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At once they saw FEMA’s criminality. In areas devastated by flooding and landslides, FEMA and ATF agents warrantlessly entered homes and emerged from them carrying residents’ firearms and other private property, such as jewelry and cash. An elderly woman who had braved the storm, and whose house was in disrepair, and protested the warrantless trespass got thrown to the ground for merely speaking up. A FEMA agent told her, “This ain’t your property anymore.”

He had barely finished his sentence when three bullets struck his back. He toppled over, falling into the woman’s driveway flooded with brackish water. The other agents, too, were dead before they could spin around and draw weapons. Our source said similar incidents have occurred throughout the area.

Instead of distributing relief supplies—food, water, etc.—FEMA confiscated cases of bottled water and canned goods that citizen Samaritans distributed among the walking wounded and the displaced. Red Hats, our source said, “cleaned FEMA’s clock,” wiping out dozens of feds infringing on the constitutional rights of the citizenry.

The tenacious Red Hats suffered casualties as well.

Upon arriving in Chimney Rock—which the federal government had seized under “eminent domain” to commandeer the area’s valuable lithium deposits—Red Hats confronted tremendous opposition. From flooded US Highway 64 to the peak of Perigone’s Point, the opposing forces skirmished incessantly, expending, our source said, enormous amounts of ammunition and other ordnance. Bodies from each side fell left and right.

After FEMA ambushed and slaughtered 12 Red Hats at a trailhead, Col. Kurtz, as reported previously, made an impassioned plea to Gen. Smith, asking that they set aside personal disputes and fight FEMA as a cohesive unit. Kurtz even said he’d defer to Gen. Smith’s judgment, as he has more experience combatting FEMA. Following an emergency White Hat council meeting, Gen. Smith agreed, and White Hats—Marines, soldiers, and members of the Special Operations community, joined Red Hats on the mountain, forming a “union,” as we call the coalition.

United, they reportedly drove FEMA off the mountain after gaining a tactical advantage, and killed agents who were holed up in positions above the flood zone. When FEMA tried landing helicopters filled with reinforcements, Union forces fired at them, downing one and forcing the other to retreat.

That victory, though, was ephemeral. The next day, a federal cavalcade barreled into Chimney Rock, blockading the highway and ordering Union forces to surrender by order of “President Harris.” The Union had prepped for a protracted standoff, and with elevation advantage, began plinking off feds as they stepped out of their vehicles, many of which had been fitted to traverse deep water.

As of this writing, the battle for Chimney Rock rages on, with neither side yielding ground. Our source said the Union’s tactical expertise will ultimately lead to victory.

Elsewhere, Union troops have engaged FEMA in Florida, and we’ll provide details on that theater of conflict in the next article.

In closing, our source said Gen. Smith and Kurtz met in person to discuss the collaborative effort.

“Sometimes uniting to fight a shared enemy can bring two people closer together,” he said.

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