Sunday, December 15, 2024

Fake Biden Tries to Pardon Already Dead Deep Staters

By Michael Baxter 

On Tuesday, the US Navy Judge Advocate General’s Corps chuckled upon receiving a letter purportedly written by pResident Joseph R. Biden. In it, the author identifying as Biden demanded the immediate release of 50 Deep Staters currently “illegally detained” at GITMO’s Camp Delta detention center, saying he, still the acting commander-in-chief, was commuting and pardoning persons such as Merrick Garland, Avril Haines, Anthony Fauci, Kamala Haris, Alvin Bragg, and dozens of others, most of whom JAG already executed.

A JAG source told Real Raw News that Vice Admiral Christopher French received the comical letter, dated 12/7/2024, Tuesday afternoon and had a forensic handwriting analysis compare the text against publicly available documents Biden had signed as a senator and as vice president to Barack Hussein Obama. The study conclusively proved someone other than Biden had written the correspondence. The slants, angles, spacing, strokes, and formatting were dissimilar to archived examples of Biden’s handwriting.

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Although the author is a mystery, Adm. French, our source said, is certain it isn’t a clone of Biden. Clones have imperfections, but even a Generation One clone should have had the ability to reasonably mimic the real Biden’s cursive with a modicum of accuracy. The forensic analyst reportedly told Adm. French the forgery was the worst he had ever seen and that a kindergarten student with a box of crayons could’ve better simulated Biden’s script.

Our source said the document and the envelope were dusted for fingerprints, but none were found.

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“A few thoughts crossed our minds, Mike. Either some random person who reads alternative news sources like yours sent the latter as a ha ha ha, or it came from someone in the Deep State who really didn’t know we’d already hanged the people they were naming off. The return address on the envelope was 1600 Pennsylvania Avenue, but we know the actual Biden hasn’t been there since the Obama days, and, in fact, President Trump and Elon are already back in the White House trying to stave off a potential World War III. But—and I can’t go into details on this—the letter was sent by diplomatic mail to an address the public wouldn’t know about,” our source said.

Part of the letter read as follows: “Over the past four years, you have defied my authority by arresting members of my administration and my friend on behalf of Donald Trump. These unconscionable and unconstitutional arrests have been acts of treason against the United States of America. Today, you have the historic ability to correct your injustices by freeing the people named below, to whom I am granting irrevocable clemency. Admiral French, I hope you’re more reasonable than Trump’s puppet, Adm. Crandall. It’s too late for him, but you can right his wrongdoings. I am still the President of the United States and your commander-in-chief, and you have sworn an oath to obey me.”

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Interestingly, the letter also granted clemency to, and demanded the release of, former Press Secretary Jen Psaki and actor George Clooney—both subjects of White Hat investigations who have yet to be arrested for treason and willful dissemination of enemy propaganda.

“If someone disappeared those two, it wasn’t us,” our source said. “If this is from the Deep State, it’s obviously an issue of the left hand not knowing what the right hand is doing—a big problem with compartmentalization.”

The letter’s valediction, our source said, included a veiled threat: “Ignore me at your peril.”

“Assuming Joseph Biden’s still alive, and that’s huge if, he wouldn’t have the audacity to threaten us. He’s a feckless, meek coward, senile and powerless, and probably dead. The dead pardoning the dead—that’s a first,” our source said.

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Helena Carey
Helena Carey
Helena Carey is a seasoned news author renowned for her engaging storytelling and insightful analysis. With a decade of journalism experience, she's a trusted voice in the ever-evolving news landscape.

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