By Michael Baxter
President Donald J. Trump’s adversaries are delusional and pernicious, evidenced by JAG’s interrogation of former Pentagon cyber boss Gen. Tim Haugh, who was arrested and taken to JAG’s Pensacola, Florida, headquarters only hours after Trump fired him on April 3.
As reported, U.S. Marines apprehended Haugh at his Maryland home that evening and showed him a military arrest warrant charging him with treason and espionage. Teetering on his doorstep clutching an almost drained bottle of Jack Daniels, Haugh begrudged the Marines for refusing to drink with him before dragging him away in handcuffs. On April 27, we published an article summarizing Haugh’s crime: he and co-conspirators had planned to install a self-replicating computer virus on the PJM Interconnection power grid to cause a 30-day blackout across multiple states and hope society would condemn Trump for the ensuant chaos.
Before going to GITMO, Haugh was interrogated aggressively in Pensacola, where he uttered an alarming yet dubious proclamation, although he wouldn’t address the computer virus. He claimed the Deep State let Trump win the 2024 election knowing Trump would “fuck the country up so bad” that America would never again vote for a Republican presidential candidate.
What follows is abbreviated dialogue from Haugh’s interrogation:
Haugh: “Trump won because we let him; we could’ve installed Harris or even Biden, had we really wanted to.”
Interrogator 1: “No one’s interested in your rants, but you should be interested in saving your life. So, a confession, and naming your associates we haven’t grabbed yet, and we got most of them, might, I stress might, earn you some credit.”
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Interrogator 2: “Once you get to GITMO, it’s over. Finality. It would behoove you to cooperate.”
Haugh: “I am cooperating, but you’re too damn daft, too caught up in analyzing one piece of a large puzzle. Can’t you see, everything happening is by our design, unfolding as we intend it to.”
Interrogator 2: “We’re not here to decode your cryptic psychobabble.”
Interrogator 1: “I’ll bite. You say you, I guess the Deep State, facilitated Trump’s victory. Why? Isn’t that counter to your nature?”
Haugh: “The Deep State, a colorful phrase Trump coined. What you call us really doesn’t matter at all.”
Interrogator 1: “Amuse us. How did you let him win?”
Haugh: “That cannot be revealed.”
Interrogator 2: “Enough with this horse shit. Let’s waterboard his ass.”
Interrogator 1: “Hang on. So, detainee, if you won’t tell us how you let Trump win, tell us why.”
Haugh: “That’s as clear as the nose on your face. We knew that Trump, if given a second term, would run amuck with the government, appoint inexperienced, groveling sycophants to key positions, and drive the country into ruin. Tearing babies from mothers’ arms, locking up citizens, tariff wars, antagonizing our allies, scandal after scandal. The country will tolerate only so much before calling for Trump’s head on a platter. But Trump won’t stop. He can’t help himself. By 2028, he’ll have turned the United States into a third-world dictatorship, and the outcry will be so loud no Republican will sit in the Oval Office after him. He’s the instrument of his party’s destruction. Honestly, though, we didn’t expect he’d start killing himself so quickly, but all the better.”
Interrogator 2: “Your version of history is…distorted. And your version of the future is imaginary.”
Haugh: “MAGA is fractured, weak, and growing weaker daily.”
Interrogator 1: “Your Deep State is almost dead. We’ve caught most of you, like we got you, and now we’re sweeping up the crumbs.”
Haugh: “There are more of us than you know. And the more damage Trump makes, the more us they’ll be. It’s inevitable. Order will be restored, and the nation will have peace.”
Interrogator 2: “What you call order, we call treason. What you call peace, we call enslavement, subjugation.”
Haugh: “Only for those who deserve it. The Deep State, as you call us, is a response to Trump. He created us, unwittingly of course, but created us nonetheless. It’s a causality. See, he was never meant to be president, but a schism occurred, a rupture in the fabric of reality that aided his rise to power. We once thought killing him would fix the problem, but that proved impossible. So, we’ve come to understand that he’ll self-implode, taking the country with him. His greed, thirst for power, and constant need to be worshipped by unqualified yes-men guarantee the outcome. In the end we win; he loses.”
Interrogator 1: “A rip in reality, huh? I think you’ve been hitting Star Trek a bit too hard.”
Interrogator 2: “There’s only one loser here today, Mr. Haugh, and, tag, you’re it. You’re contradicting yourself. On one hand, you say warped reality let Trump win; on the other, you say the Deep State let him win.”
Haugh: “A contaminated reality got him to the White House the first time. We ensured it in 2024, and, yes, we’ll help him blow himself up, not that he isn’t doing a great job it by himself. This term, he’s unconstrained, unrestrained, and his unlawful executive orders have opened a lot of doors, and we’re loving it.”
Interrogator 1: “Oh, really, then why are so many Democrats bitching about him on the news?”
Haugh: “We all have our parts to play.”
Interrogator 2: “Seems your part ends hanging from a rope.”
Haugh: “If that’s my destiny, I accept it.”
